It's been a very full, busy week. Here's the F5, short and sweet.
The questions are simple, the answers unlimited. Go!
Beloved Momma, aka Lumpy the Magnificent, aka My Lady Cluckington
NOW would be great. Today would be really good. Next Friday would be, umm, uncomfortable to say the least. Even though due date is not yet here, Momma's body says it's time to deliver, except she's not delivering.
The Birthing Tub at our hospital. The labor room at our hospital. Anywhere but the seat of our car on the way TO said hospital. (Honey, the upholstery...)
Because Momma is tired, uncomfortable and her body has been getting ready for nearly three weeks now.
Because if Momma's body gets any more ready, Daddy is afraid Baby-to-be will just fall out when labor does begin (see upholstery above).
Because Momma wants DESPERATELY to sleep on her side again.
Because Daddy is tired of sleeping in the bed all by himself.
Because Daddy is tired of sleeping, period.
Because Momma & Daddy want to learn how to change diapers.
Because both Momma & Daddy cringe every time the phone rings: if we answer, we have to tell people why Momma hasn't delivered yet, and if we don't answer, people assume that Momma is on her way to the hospital to deliver.
Because when you've waited 32 years for something, no word in any language can describe the interminable wait of the last few days.
Because Momma & Daddy have the collective patience of a tsetse fly.
For this we've had many suggestions, some of which we've tried and some we have not. You get to figure out which is which:
Spicy Mexican Food
Spicy Mexican Food followed by a hot bath.
Mowing the lawn followed by a hot bath (or, in our clime and season, driving the snowblower followed by a hot bath)
Walking on the treadmill.
Pogo sticks (Daddy might take it up just to relieve stress)
Cleaning the house
Watching "A Baby Story" until Momma cries
Life is good. Baby-to-be is healthy. We're not complaining. Okay, yes, we are, but we laugh a lot, too. Pray for us!