Temptation, Recuperation, Addiction, Exasperation - Not Necessarily In That Order

I've not been a very happy camper these past few days. Matter of fact, I've been pretty much a pissant since all our family left Sunday afternoon. Grrrrr.

It all started on Thursday night when I noticed a tickle in my throat. By morning it had grown into a full-fledged sore throat: I'm sick with the Crud. Nothing major, mind you, and certainly not strep or walking pneumonia like Matt had a few weeks ago. But not fun. By Saturday afternoon, I was struggling to speak clearly and swallow without pain - right as our friends and family started arriving. Sunday afternoon was my installation service. It was wonderful and humbling at the same time - all these people celebrating the ministry they think we can do, with me as pastor and leader. *gulp* But I digress - I'll cover the installation more tonight from home.

I couldn't sing on Sunday. Literally couldn't hold a pitch at all - I sounded like the pimply kid on the Simpsons: "Mister, I can't stand the sound of your voice!" I said "Martin Luther" in the course of my sermon and it sounded like I had gone back to age 13. Not pretty.

Speaking of my sermon, it wasn't great. You'd think that the confrontation between Jesus and Satan, with its themes of temptation, fasting and the ministry of the angels would provide lots of fruitful space for preaching, but this week, it didn't. It wasn't even good, in my opinion: scattered words about Jesus and nothing really worth saying in the end. It can be SO frustrating when that happens: you think you've got something good and you just can't make it work right. Sometimes you preach the Word, and sometimes you preach words, unfortunately - I just wish it had been better for my family, who traveled quite a distance to see the Center and be with us on Sunday. Maybe next time.

Yesterday morning, I decided to take a 1/2 day of sick leave. I normally work about four hours on Monday afternoons: clean out the last of the stuff from Sunday, take a first look at the next Sunday's readings, email & phone calls, etc., so I can hit Tuesdays hard and get a lot done for the week. But I just felt punky yesterday - worn out and like I needed a break (after two weeks of being at the church at least once every day, you think I might have needed to stop?). So even though I was far from incapacitated, I did stay home yesterday. But we didn't get as much rest as we'd hoped, for our little Princess has decided she's too good to hold her own sippy cup anymore: she just walks up to you and throws the damned thing in your lap, then throws a fit if you don't pick her up and shove it into her face. The other fun bit is Ainsley's complete 180 regarding the Leapfrog Farm Magnet Matt & Sweetie and Kiddo gave her for her 1st birthday. On Sunday, she couldn't get enough of it. Now, she pokes the button, freaks out when the song starts, but continues to freak out if you turn the sound off. What. The. F#$@. Is. This?

Now, this morning. First, I forgot to get more coffee at the market yesterday, so I was down to dragging the last beans out of the coffee jar this morning and grinding the hell out of them to get the brew strong enough (finer grind = more surface contact = stronger coffee. You get that for free). But the filter folded over for some reason, grounds plugged the driphole on our coffeemaker, and with Ainsley throwing a sippy-cup fit in the basement, I came upstairs for my first cup to find coffee everywhere, EXCEPT in the pot, of course. grrrrr

I'm still a bit sick: feeling achy and clearing that nasty, rust-flavored phlegm out of my lungs when I cough. Voice is getting there, thankfully, but it's going to be a bit yet. At least today I sound marginally human. Grrrrr

And it snowed. Again. Several inches. Had to shovel instead of getting out for my morning run. GRRRRRRRR

After all of this, I was, as stated previously, pissy. GRRRRRRRRROWL Snapped at the wife. Snapped at the kid. Grumbled my way through my shower and a cup of hot chocolate (please, God, SOMETHING with caffeine to take the edge off). I stumbled into the market to buy coffee beans and decided I should splurge and get a Starbucks before I bit someone's head off.

Thus far it's keeping me sane. And I'm the only one here. Perhaps a sign on my office door (caution: caffeine addict in detox) might be in order. But hey, I just called Beloved and she's forgiven me - because I'm a lucky bastard, and sometimes, that's enough.

So, that's the present state of things: Temptation, Recuperation, Addiction, Exasperation. I'll add Contrition and Exoneration, considering Beloved and I are doing okay now. The last, then, for today will be this: Completion.