As I was trying to get the Durufle video from YouTube working yesterday, I noticed that the countdown widget for Grandma's Marathon to your right was down to less than 14 days. My first response was, "Oh, shit." Second response: "Well, it's not like you haven't run the full 26.2 before, right?" Third response: "Where did all the time go?"
I entered Grandma's just after we moved to Ames. In the time since then, I've broken and repaired our treadmill twice. After the second breakdown we joined a gym and will be selling said treadmill soon (we bought it back in the days when the nearest gym was 30 miles away and winter lasted six months). So even though we've had some of the nastiest weather I've ever experienced this winter and spring, it's not as if I haven't had the opportunity to do the training required for running a marathon. Well, running a marathon well, that is.
There are a number of reasons I haven't trained as well as I would have preferred. Numero Uno on that list is the move. Putting all your stuff where you think it oughta go is difficult, frustrating and time-consuming; some of our items have moved three or four times since the three of us came to Ames. Reason the second is the child(ren). I love running, but I love being a good daddy even more, so my priorities have changed. Frankly, it's been frustrating; being with my daughter is wonderful, and the right thing for me to do, but it's hard to make that sacrifice. Helping Kristin with her pregnancy as I'm able also takes up a lot of time, and believe me when I say that in two months I'll be lucky to get out for a run at all for a while. Add in a bit of sympathy weight (it's hard NOT to eat when your life partner is noshing every chance she gets) and the lousy weather and it's not surprising that I'm going into this marathon just hoping to beat my 4:35:00 from the last time out.
This morning I tried something new. Kristin is teaching a morning water aerobics class that falls squarely, for me, on the most inconvenient morning hour possible. I like to get up at 6:00, do some devotional reading and sip a cup of coffee or two, then head out for my run at 7:00, but for this summer, that 7:00 hour is taken up with childcare while Kris goes out to make some money (which I don't oppose - we like money here). So, today was day one of the "How Freaking Early Do You Want To Run?" experiment - a 5:00 a.m. wake-up call followed by a 5:30 am run. All told, it went well, but if you'd have told me fifteen years ago that I'd be doing this I'd have either laughed in your face or punched you for a liar. Ah, how life changes.
Time and priorities - it all comes down to that, doesn't it? Do I want to stay healthy, or do I want to polish off the bag of barbecue potato chips? (Stay healthy - rats). Do I want to play with Ainsley, or do I want to dump her on Kristin so I can get my run in? Blog or Facebook? Read a book or watch Mike Roe fall into something icky on Dirty Jobs? We often think about morality as if everything were a choice between good and evil, but I'm finding more often that the choices are really between two different kinds of good (e.g. BBQ potato chips taste good vs. running builds good health and makes me feel good about myself). A few years ago my new year's resolution was to spend more time making things instead of consuming them, but it's a hard road to walk when it's so much easier (and quicker) to buy what you need/want. Sometimes good priorities come with a price that can be difficult to pay.
I ran out of time for really doing this marathon well, but for the most part that time was better spent, in ways more suited to my genuine priorities, and the cost is not so much I can't bear it. Instead of pushing myself and possibly earning an injury, I'll enjoy a long run down the Lake Superior shoreline with two good friends, which is a priority I'm happy to indulge. If you're in Duluth a week from Saturday, look for me at the finish line in Canal Park at about noon or so, and if I'm smiling, that'll be the proof that it was all time well spent.
priorities are hard... terribly. choices are everywhere and it's an excellent case you make that sin works so subtly.
ReplyDeletei spent the day sorting clothes and have about load #4 of things i do not wear, that are headed out of our home to folks who can use 'em. because really after a decade and those uh BBQ potato chips, am I going to wear that stuff again?